I always thought that this large wound in his upper body was from Eve's sniper shot. This wound is also emphasized heavily during the title sequence, which makes sense to me, since it was rather the sniper shot that "killed" him and not those rather small grazing shots from Patrice.
I think the shots from Patrice only left some small wounds that healed easily and didn't leave any further scars (and you don't see any large blood stain on his upper body after Patrice's shots). This could also be the reason why Bond didn't discover those shrapnels earlier, when operating the sniper wound shortly after the shot. They just "got lost" in the more severe injury he received from Eve.
EDIT: As to your updated question, I really like the interresting viewpoint of Bond faking getting shot and your reasoning is not bad. But from the emphasize of this significant wound during the title sequence and no signs of it during the train chase (after getting shot at in the crane), I still stand by my answer. And in the end, don't forget the recoil. Ok, a bullet throwing him away that heavily is probably not that realistic in the first place, but Bond alone doing this?
And likewise, whereas I understand your explanation of Bond's reasons, I would still doubt that he would abort this important mission just because he feels insulted by M. Of course he is upset after actually getting "killed", but aborting the mission (which he was still confident to succeed in) and playing dead just because M ordered Eve to shoot without him actually being hit would be a bit too childish from him. In the end Eve could've just hit Patrice and the mission succeeded, which he wouldn't even realize had he just thrown himself off the train (and into a possible death) right after hearing the shot. And he isn't one of the people getting nervous when hearing shots at all.
EDIT: Ok, after rechecking it (and thanks to Shane's/your comment), I have to correct that you can indeed see a large blood stain right after Bond is shot by Patrice inside the crane. So this renders my theory of the shoulder wound being from Eve's shot totally wrong. Nevertheless I'll leave my last paragraph as it stands, even if I'm for now a bit more unclear about Bond faking his death and might start to tend to your theory.
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